Gratitude

I’ve been absolutely stressing out about anything under the sun that has come my way the last couple weeks. This stress has thrown my three basic tenets – broke, lazy, and green – out the window.

How can I fix my mental state?

After eating fast food, junk food, a few impulse purchases, and a fair number of anxious tears I decided this isn’t okay.

Sound like something you’ve gone through? Whether it’s an unexpected bill pops up at the worst possible time, a love interest rejects you, or you get passed up for a promotion, when difficult and negative emotions pop up they take over.

I often let anxieties live in my head. Rent-free as they say. I can’t say I’m done with them forever. It may just take one more upsetting event to set me off, but today I feel so much better.

I have meditated and done gratitude lists and the like before. Each time I feel a bit better, then these new efforts eventually fall to the wayside. I’m no expert at developing habits. I often take my habit cues from zenhabits.net. As for dealing with the anxieties, I’m often overwhelmed by all the information out there.

The point of this post is to remind myself and anyone who needs reminding that this stuff is working. And it will take work for it to keep working. That’s not stressful work, it is positive and helpful work.

I’ve done two things in the last two days that have made a huge difference.

First, I was told to make a list of all events of my day and assigned a value to them. I CANNOT include stuff that goes on in my head. When you try this it can be as basic as I brushed my teeth (+1), my best friend called (+2), or I completed a big work project (+3). I dropped my phone and the screen cracked (-1), my lunch had spoiled so I had to skip it (-2), to my beloved pet died (-10).

In doing this I’ve noticed that when I look back on the day and am reminded of all the little good things, the positives outweigh the negatives. We are wired to remember the negative, but for the anxious and depressed that is detrimental. Sometimes, we need simple reminders that life will be alright.

Secondly, I meditated. No ‘om’ chants, no incense, no bad tries at perfectly emptying my brain. I used a guided youtube video, there are many to try. I simply focused on my breathing, then my body, sounds I could hear, and so on. It was focusing on the present that really made me breathe easier.

Yes, I may get fired tomorrow. I might also win a million dollars. Both are equally unlikely and should have no bearing on my today. All the baggage from yesterday? Can’t change the past.

I will need constant reminding of all this, day in and day out. But for now I’m adding to my list that I wrote a blog post (+2). Make an effort to remember the positives, the negatives and naysayers will handle the bad stuff without you. 🙂

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